Love is in the air. The aisles of Walmart are overflowing with heart shaped boxes of chocolate, valentine cards and giant stuffed animals. People are buying flowers for their significant other or family members, and couples have started to make dinner reservations for their date night. Yes, Valentine’s Day is drawing near, and with each passing day I realize that once again, I will be alone again. The thought has always weighed me down. I am a strong believer in love and a helpless romantic. I have read all the books and watched all the movies (including Hallmark movies) and even written the stories about it. They’re about how the girl meets the guy, they fall in love, the guy (or girl, sometimes) messes up or there is some misunderstanding and they push the other away, then in some The Notebook-esque moment, a grand gesture is made, then they get back together and live “happily ever after”. I know the story line inside and out, believe me. And every year when Valentine’s Day comes around I am forced to stomach the idea of spending the day alone, and sometimes that is hard for me. I have always been one who wanted that storybook, picture perfect movie love. But this year it is different. Yes, I am still single, but this year I am not bitter or upset by that idea. I don’t have that overwhelming sense of loneliness. And let me tell you, it is amazing. I have started to focus on myself and my relationship with God, and with guidance of professors and friends from school, I have learned so much. The biggest thing I have learned is that I just need to focus on me, my relationship with God, serving Him, and just living my life. He is a jealous God, and He wants all of me and my heart. He wants to be #1 in my life, even if I am in a relationship. When I think about this, the song “How He Loves” comes to mind. If you haven’t heard it, some of the lyrics are “He is jealous for me. Love like a hurricane I am a tree.” He wants me. I find it amazing that He wants me, a dirty sinner. I have failed Him more times than I can count, and I will continue to do so no matter how hard I try. When I think about it, I am not alone this year for Valentine’s Day. I have the greatest love ever. He has suffered for me, and wants me even though I fail Him daily. He was mocked, beaten, forced to carry the cross He was going to die on while being spit on, then He was nailed to a cross and suffered a horrible death for me. He is my love. He is the only one I need. I will follow Him, love Him, praise Him and serve Him. When I am able to give Him all of me, then maybe He will introduce me to a man. But until that day, I will continue to serve, follow and grow in my relationship with Him. This Valentine’s day I am going to love myself and fall deeper in love with God. Happy Valentine’s Day!
“... he made himself nothing by taking the very nature of a servant, being made in human likeness. And being found in appearance as a man, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to death—even death on a cross!” Philippians 2:7-8
“This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us…” 1st John 3:16
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